Illustration by Karly Andersen
My best childhood memories are of family vacations: hiking with my dad through Bryce Canyon’s rock hoodoos in Utah, scouring French Quarter shops with my mom in New Orleans and maneuvering a little red sailboat through the water with my brother. When I look back at my life, it’s the experiences, not material things, that make the highlight reel.
Now, as a mother, I love seeing the wonder of travel through my boys. I vividly remember William at age 2 in Puerto Rico picking up a coconut half his body weight. I can still see the excitement on Anders’ face watching his first major league baseball game. I’ll never forget their awe while snorkeling a reef in Key Largo or their belly laughs as we flew down a snowy hill in Park City in Utah, all of our inner tubes tied together.
While some of our best times have been on vacation, trips can also bring out our worst. Traffic jams, delayed flights, forgotten luggage and canceled plans can be stressful, disappointing and even excruciating when piled on top of jet lag, crappy food and unfamiliar surroundings. Traveling comes with loads of life lessons. I hope that each hiccup leaves us better equipped to problem-solve and go with the flow the next go-round.
Amy Verdi, owner of Fairytale Travel in Richmond, says being flexible and lowering expectations are key when traveling with kids. Besides planning trips for clients, she travels often with her children, who are 2, 7 and 10.
Verdi has seen a lot of vacation meltdowns, at theme parks in particular, where days can be hot and jam-packed with activities and sensory overload. “It’s an expensive day, but it’s not worth it if everyone is miserable,” she says. “If you have a set schedule but it’s just not working out, take a step back and don’t be afraid to cancel a reservation or go back to the resort for a break. It can really help to play things by ear.”
Hiring a travel agent like Verdi can make planning a trip less overwhelming. There’s typically no cost to using a travel agent, since they’re compensated through suppliers such as theme parks, airlines and hotels.
When packing, Verdi says, consider items that will make kids feel more at home, whether it’s a favorite blanket, toy or electronic device. For little ones, she recommends bringing along a Pack ’n Play crib, baby carrier and a GoPod portable activity station. Her family never travels without a stroller, wet bag or portable cell phone charger. She also keeps stickers and activity pads handy for layovers and unexpected delays.
Upon arrival, Verdi recommends a quick grocery pickup or delivery service. “I love having bottled water on hand, my kids’ favorite snacks and fresh fruit,” she says. “Having things they normally eat helps keep them more regulated.”
Verdi says there’s no minimum age for traveling, as long as you consider your child’s wants and needs. “You understand your child better than anyone else,” she says. “Some can go all day, and for others, it’s too much. Be sure to take cues from them.”
While there can be pressure to travel for spring break, it’s OK not to take the trip. Richmond resident Laura Morris, mother of two kids ages 3 and 7, is waiting until her children are a little older before going anywhere too far.
“My husband is a CPA, and since spring break always falls at his busiest time, we end up staying home,” she says. Morris keeps her son and daughter entertained with fun local outings including trips to the river, which are more manageable.
In the world of social media, family vacations can appear magical, even perfect. But every parent knows there’s much more going on behind the scenes. I’m guilty myself of romanticizing a trip, while my husband keeps me grounded. We’re celebrating our 20th anniversary this year, and I’ve been daydreaming about Paris. We’d sip Champagne, stroll along the Seine and climb the Eiffel Tower, I imagine … then reality sets in.
Our boys, now 10 and 12, have little interest in art museums, ancient cathedrals and gourmet French cuisine. Besides, Anders’ sixth grade French would only get us so far. Now is just not the time for a European vacation, where too much would be lost on them.
Instead of boarding a transatlantic flight, we’re taking the Amtrak to New York for spring break. We’ll be eating at pizza joints rather than Michelin-starred restaurants and spending more time at Yankee Stadium than the theater. But when the kids are happy and excited, we are, too. I can’t wait to share new experiences and make more memories together. That’s what family vacations are all about.
Laura Anders Lee is a freelance writer, wife and mother of two. When she isn’t writing, she loves dreaming up the next adventure for her family.